my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
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She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
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the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
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