Texts From Last Night

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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.

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  (612): On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait. http://tfl.nu/48a7
  Replies (2) Good night (692) Bad night (1870)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.

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  (304): its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god. http://tfl.nu/qi32
  Replies (5) Good night (6681) Bad night (808)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for

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  (405): Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for http://tfl.nu/gqdd
  Replies (15) Good night (1409) Bad night (3625)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat

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  (917): So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat http://tfl.nu/4q7b
  Replies (9) Good night (888) Bad night (5909)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift

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  (917): under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift http://tfl.nu/rkcx
  Replies (52) Good night (5943) Bad night (2061)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks

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  (440): Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks http://tfl.nu/nonu
  Replies (21) Good night (7295) Bad night (1138)
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  (479): View more from Arkansas

  Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.

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  (479): Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke. http://tfl.nu/d4y7
  Replies (7) Good night (2816) Bad night (1277)
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  (269): View more from Michigan

  So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.

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  (269): So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing. http://tfl.nu/disx
  Replies (22) Good night (2743) Bad night (6507)
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  (563): View more from Iowa

  I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.

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  (563): I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay. http://tfl.nu/8krm
  Replies (3) Good night (936) Bad night (2863)
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.

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  (336): Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car. http://tfl.nu/8ezv
  Replies (11) Good night (2014) Bad night (1030)
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  (914): View more from New York

  Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO

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  (914): Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO http://tfl.nu/kxn2
  Replies (6) Good night (1943) Bad night (848)
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone

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  (804): I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone http://tfl.nu/9ph0
  Replies (11) Good night (2999) Bad night (715)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.

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  (406): Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years. http://tfl.nu/6vu8
  Replies (7) Good night (1174) Bad night (412)
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  (954): View more from Florida

  I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken

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  (954): I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken http://tfl.nu/ui33
  Replies (2) Good night (642) Bad night (236)
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  (518): View more from New York

  I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.

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  (518): I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two. http://tfl.nu/sg45
  Replies (0) Good night (372) Bad night (133)

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