My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
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