After last night, I could never be a politician.
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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