I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
my sisters under your porch take her home
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
