What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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