I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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