I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
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