I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Randomize
