please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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