i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
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