good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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