guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
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