Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Ladies don't puke and tell
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
