i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
operation have a gay friend backfired
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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