so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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