Banned from zoo.
Again?
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
I got inside last night via doggy door
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Randomize
