If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
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