what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
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She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
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I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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