Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
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