I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
The ass gains better be worth it
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