My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
Randomize
