i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
