Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
