3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Acid is not a monday night drug
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Randomize
