My hand turned me down
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
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