is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
im watching shaqs comedy special. this is how i know im not sober.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
Randomize
