sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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