I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
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