Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Randomize
