My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Randomize
