Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
He turned down a handjob. A HANDJOB. I know I'm no Jessica Simpson, but...
Actually, she's fat now, so...
Fuck. I AM Jessica Simpson.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
