i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
