i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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