At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Another day, another engagement, another cat
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
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