Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
