he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
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