Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
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