i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Randomize
