i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
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