My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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