How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
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I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
you inspire me to be a worse person
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize