After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
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