ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
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do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
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