I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Randomize