just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
