I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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