So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
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do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
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I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
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