Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
My vagina just recognized that song.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
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