As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
