she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize