There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
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